2 and a half years!

Today officially marks 2 and a half years of being a mom. It is crazy to think of all that has gone on in those past 2.5 years. From bringing home my 6 lb 7 oz newborn boy and not really sure if I knew what I was doing to having a sweet, funny, loving 28 lb little boy AND a beautiful, happy, sweet little 16 lb 5  month little girl and still not really sure if I know what I'm doing. :) But one thing I do know: I was made to be a mom and I have never felt more sure that I am doing what I am supposed to than in the last 2.5 years. Right now my little Ally girl is playing under her activity mat, which she loves. She is so happy to lay next to me and play with her toys. Ryan just loved to be held and look at books when he was her age. It's so fun to see how each is different. An hour ago I was laying with Ally while she napped...something we do nearly every day during Ryan's nap time. I was thinking about how I need to get up, get something done, etc. But, then I thought about the gift of being able to just be with my sleeping daughter next to me and how these days will not last forever, and how much I want to savor the moments. I have been reflecting on myself as a parent. I was reminded today of some things that happened when I became a new mom back in February 2010. During that month, I had three of my friends lose their babies. Two of them were newborns and one was 10.5 months. That rocked me! Not near as much as what my friends' went through, I know, but it was a hard time not knowing what to do, how to help, pray, or even what to say. Here I was with a sweet new little, healthy baby boy and my friends were in the depths of grief as they lost a part of them. I lost a lot of sleep those first few months, not because Ryan was up, but just making sure he was still breathing and worried about losing him too. I remember praying every night over his bassinet by our bed that God wouldn't take him. It made me realize that anything can happen, God is good and in control, but each breath we take is merely a gift. I am reminded to treasure the moments that we have with our little gifts. We don't know how much time we have, so we need to take advantage of what time we are given. I know that my friends cherish each minute they had with their sweet angel babies.

Now, with having two, I know how quick the early months go by and how important it is to not rush time, but to enjoy each stage. To enjoy the sweetness of the newborn and how they only need mom, and love to nurse, even when we're tired. :) To enjoy the first months of getting to know your baby, trying to rest when you can and figuring out life together. To enjoy the first sweet smiles, giggles, when they find their hands and feet. To enjoy how they are so content being held, not needing much else in life. Then to enjoy the mover, the crawling, then the walking. To enjoy the newness of life and how everything is exciting. Then the exploring, learning, running and talking. Each stage is magical as their little lives are being developed.

But there are times when I forget. I know that I am not perfect and I was just asked by my husband the other day about how he thought that I wanted to be home with the kids (I was complaining or something). And I do want to be home, I love it...but some days are hard. Some days I lose patience, especially when I am not getting enough sleep. ;) Having little ones is tough at times, but also so so much fun! I love watching them learn, explore, and sleep. ;) I love my life right now, and wouldn't trade playing cars, nursing, going to the zoo,  and playing base ball outside for anything. Even when they aren't sleeping through the night, I know that they will eventually and even to treasure the night time cuddles. I am so thankful that God has given me the opportunity to be mommy to both Ryan and Ally and I pray that I would be the mom that He has created me to be and to not take any day for granted. And with that...my two sweetest gifts:

And today: 

my life and I love it! 

Thanking Jesus for the gift of today!