Friday, January 8, 2010

Pregnancy Dreams

So, it is crazy how vivid dreams are during pregnancy. The past couple of weeks I have had really bad dreams about our sweet little dog Layla either running away, getting smashed (I know...awful), or just lost. They are so disturbing that I have to find her in the middle of the night and just hold her to calm myself down.

Well, last night was my first dream about labor. It was so crazy, that I just need to share. First of all, the timing was the present, so I was 34 weeks. My water broke, and I freaked out because we didn't have our hospital bag packed and none of the baby's clothes had been washed (things I have been thinking about because I am planning on doing all those next week). Then when we got to the hospital, it was a big warehouse where there weren't any private rooms. They were also overcrowded because of some sort of catastrophe that hit Fresno. So, the only place that they could put me was in this room where there were desks and a teacher was teaching some class on medicine. Also, to the side of me was The Well's youth group meeting place (all one big room). I kept thinking how I didn't want all these people see me give birth, but the doctor told me I didn't have a choice. I kept watching the students from the youth group dance and sing, and it was so embarrassing! I woke up before the baby actually came, and glad about that. I'm sure that this is just the start of crazy labor dreams.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

It's a New Year! :)

Today is January 3,'s crazy how fast this year has gone by! I always feel a little bittersweet at New Years because I don't like the idea of something I decided to not think of it as an end, but as a sweet memory that will merge into more memories of the year(s) to come. 2009 started out last year at Hartland Christian Camps, where Jason's parents, sister, brother and us were all able to spend a week enjoying the snow and one another. I remember on New Year's Eve that Jason's parents shared a verse that they had specifically picked out for each of us, and shared their thoughts and prayers for us. I was inspired by that tradition and picked out a verse that I would pray for both Jason and I. It was Philippians 2:1-2, "If you have any encouragement from being united in Christ, if any comfort from His love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose." My prayer was that throughout the year, God would lead Jason and I together in our purpose and desires. As I reflect on this past year, I see how God really did lead us.
This past year was filled with many blessings. Jason finished his masters degree, and I finished my first full year of teaching. I was reading my journal from last Christmas and was praying about God bringing us a child in His timing, and in May I found out that I was of the coolest gifts ever! Jason and I had the opportunity in the summer to take 15 high school students to Guatemala to serve the people there. We were blown away by their willingness to cross cultural, language and economic boundaries all in the name of Jesus Christ. We were blessed to see Christ work in a powerful way in the lives of those students. Also, it was there, where Jason and I both had the sense that this year was not going to look like the way we necessarily planned it. When we returned, I was expected to hear where I would be teaching at, but when there were no calls, and no promises of a job, we both had a peace that I wasn't supposed to be working this year, which has been something that was difficult in the beginning, but such a gift to be home and not have the extra stress and business that came with teaching. Jason also started teaching at Fresno Pacific, which was a blessing financially since I was not working, and he has really enjoyed his time as a professor (maybe minus all the grading :) ). Now, as we finished out the year, we feel like God has us where we are supposed to be and excited about what is to come.
This year I know that God is going to do some great things. First of all, baby Ryan Ekk is going to be here before we know it, and we are excited, nervous, but ready to enter the phase of parenthood and to meet our little gift. Also, we have no idea where we will be in 8 months. Jason has been busy applying to law schools all across the nation, and so we trust that God will lead us where we are supposed to go. As I start out this next year, my heart is to allow God to lead us in His ways. Proverbs 16:3 says, "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed," but we also need to remember that our plans aren't necessarily God's plans, so we need to be open to whatever He has for us. We are also reminded of this in Proverbs 16:9, "In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." I am excited to see what is going to happen, knowing that it will not all be easy, but God has been so faithful to us and I know we will be ok in His hands. Happy New Year Everyone!